Archive for the ‘anganku’ Category

aku kembali…..

Aduh so long i didnt write new post, busy, sick, and have no ide, and upset all come together in the same time.. I miss you all blogger and i miss to share what i had so far..ach.. really im too tired.

So many things is happening and i almost lost my control.. i just can praying to ALLAH SWT to give me more support and power to passing all the time.. From last posting i get sick and need rest for 2 weeks and i cant do much tings.. and i must sifthing my room accomodation to others room and working with so busy in the night as i got night sift and cant do anything more with my laptop,my mind so full and really too tired to talk about it…

My duty so busy with all guest check out and check in.. no much time for break and sleep enough.. the next day wake up and start again.. walah.. i felt like robot.. i miss my home but what to do.. i cant home rigght now.. and my time is next year..

but one things one i feel happy.. i meet many indonesian friends here and sometime we seat together and cooking our food and laughing.. is really help to relieve the stress of job.. they so funny expecially if we talk about others nationality.. ( they way they talk and attitude ) some how is funny for us and strange.. i think they also think we are strange too. but never mind…im enjoy to join them and relaxing.

now im back.. i want to say hello to all my friends in blogger and wish can get support of you and wish i can some more ide to talk again or do somemore posting..i miss you……






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anganku… just angan…

 Terlalu Indah tuk dilupakan,

Terlalu sedih tuk dikenangkan

Setelah aku jauh berjalan… engkau ku tingglkan

Betapa hatiku bersedih….

Mengenang kasih dan sayangmu

Setulus pesanmu kepadaku… engkau kan menunggu..

Andaikan kau datang kembali…. jawaban apa yang ku beri.

Adahkah jalan yang kau temui….untuk kita kembali lagi…


Nice melody and song from Ruth Sahanaya was in my Mp3.. i feel that my tears come to my face…oh that song really shoot my feeling at moment. I dont know what i should be..shall i crying or shall i screaming??? what i have to do now…????? tell me… tell me..

I lose my control, i lose my self on moment… i still remember you guy..and i still hope you guy. I know is impossible and i’m can not expecting anything from you.. i just ask little time but you never had time for me…..

Now my Mp3 play MY WAY from Frank Sinatra… Waduh… all is oldies song and make me more sad and want me cry…. My Way… yes.. this my way… i must go to my way and you go to your way.. Our ways is much different and cant be together. Just Miracle of God can be make it happen.Now where are you not even i know it. I just wonder why i must meet you and my feeling grow up to love you.. but why God wonts us be together..?? why always like this….???

Life is goes on… there is many thing still waiting for me and future. I cant just stop my feet and look at back all the time.. i must wake up and put strong feeling for next step what is will be happen.And not fall down again.. Failed is really good teacher for us to lear and learn and learn about life.. about love and about commitment. 

Dont stop your feet step and dont going back from your pass. Now and future is waiting for you. Be strong always….I wish on it.

for you  Farhan ” Koky” Khan

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Enough 4me…

Cukup sudah aku mendengar katamu. cukup sudah aku mendengar ceritamu, cukup sudah aku berkata kepadamu, cukup sudah aku menelan derita ini.cukup sudah aku mengikuti langkahmu..cukup..cukup… cukup…

Aku ingin dalam diriku sendiri. aku ingin berjalan dalam langkahku, aku ingin berkata, aku ingin menjerit, aku ingin menangis, aku ingin semua yang ingin kulakukan…aku ingin…..

Dalam gelapku aku bersandar, dalam heningku aku merenung, dalam tangisku aku menjerit, dalam sakitku aku memohon.cukup….. cukup….. cukup…..

kenapa dia selalu menyakitiku.. kenapa dia selalu pergi dan datang seperti itu..?adakah waktu untuk aku bersandar kepadamu..? adakah secuil kata indah yang bisa kau ucap kepadaku..??? adakah waktumu untuk berbagi cerita dan dukaku???  tidak.. tidak.. you never have time for me..you always say no to me.. what ever i ask,what ever i want, did you care about it…? no..no.. NEVER YOU CARE AT ALL.  You never think about it and never want to know about what i feeling…..

Oh.. kapan deritaku berakhir…? kapan aku bisa berlabuh untuk selamanya dengan kenyamanan hati dan diriku? adakah tempat untuk diriku??? dan kenapa hatiku selalu tak kuasa menolak apa permintaanmu…. tak kah kau merasa perjuanganku dan perhatianku…? On my praying i always ask ALLAH SWT to bless you and safe you. I want you always be happy even my heart is broken….i can wish you belongs me,but is dreaming only..i wish always together with you is also dreaming only..you just want me if you want me.. but when is my turn to need you you never be here.Anyway im still here and will be there for you…..i wish i can do my best for you.

**  for you Farhan ” KOKY ”  Khan

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